Did I handle this all wrong-guy tells me he lives with his ex?

I've been seeing a guy that I really started to like; it felt to me mutual. He text during day, come over to my house. It was short lived and moved quickly and I slept with him after which I ended it. He was over my house and started ranting about the ex he's living with, calling her the "b" word with such intensity (i interpreted it as love frustration), that he's there for the kids, that he can't stand her yet not giving a clear indication when he would leave.."maybe next week". He insists while seeing him they sleep separately, they don't have . He told me after a couple times seeing him the living situation. What got me was the statement he made that he does so much for her and she still treats him like crap. That hurt because I feel he loves her and when I said that he got angry. He told me how much he did for her family, she steals money from him, etc. I tried to be patient but I was getting very hurt and a little afraid. So I tried to re-direct him and shortly after we ended up in bed whereby I believe he made a reference to her saying he liked my eyes and started to go on about liking woman with my kind of eyes and I told him I knew what he was thinking, and he kinda smiled and stopped talking. That night I left him a really bad voice message telling him that he's a cheater or a person incapable of mutual respect and kindness because he feels unworthy. I told him after everything he told me, I don't want a man who lives with a woman who uses and takes advantage of him that he must be some sort of sadistic to move back in with her. Apparently from what I got, this must be an on again off again; their oldest is 11 years old. He kept telling me he wanted it to work with me all along. Problem is is miss him terrible now; what I said was inappropriate and embarring because I attacked his psyche. I did text him the reference to her before that call and told him I had feelings too and it hurt. He never replied except to text 2 hours later good night. That's when I left the message. From what I read, I guess it can be ok to live with an ex and the kids. I am upset about my communication skills and how I totally isolated any further relationship. He just kept insisting he's there for the kids and when I told him it would be better they didn't see the example of them fighting, he said it gets worse when he doesn't live there because she lives anywhere with them. I'm upset because maybe I should've just enjoyed it and saw what happened. I really miss him and he's not returning my text messages, so I stopped trying.